Let Life Be Just That

Looking back on my last post, I think (as you probably do too) that it was rather negative. But to be honest, I'm glad I wrote what I did. Because it was truly how I was feeling. I tend to value a more raw expression of emotion than a cover up what I was legitimately experiencing in my heart. There's no shame in fear, because we're only human. The shame would occur only if we were to trap ourselves in that fear and not dare to venture outside of it.

School has been an experience already. I'm still trying to find everything on campus, and on the rare occasion I forget where that English workshop is on Tuesday mornings, I am still pulling out my little map of campus. Overall though, I think I might enjoy university. Once I survive the first set of exams. Then I'll know exactly what I've gotten myself into.

This past weekend I had the chance to return home to Huntsville for a wedding. It was then that I realized how different life is going to be from here on out. Yes, I was away all last year and it was the start of independent life, but returning home for a visit made real the fact that I am growing up and moving on. Anyone who knows me well knows I strongly dislike change. Eventually I adapt, but this is so much bigger than any other change before.

I am still undecided as to whether or not I like growing up. I heard it said once that the lucky ones don't grow up. And I think what was meant by that was, yes, of course the individual grows up, but in that growth that person still makes room for fun, adventure, craziness, and they never lose sight of how important stopping and smelling the roses is. On my way home to Huntsville for the wedding, my dad and I stopped in the middle of Algonquin Park to step out into pitch black darkness, gaze at the stars, and howl at the wolves. I feel like life should be like that car ride. Yes, there is business and things to be done, but in the middle of it all, time should be taken everyday for pure enjoyment in its most beautiful sense. Which sounds cliche now that I reread it, but it has never been less true. Don't get too busy folks. Make time (I sound like my father) for Jesus and love, stars and wolves, spontaneous adventures and planned tea dates, for family and a good ole dance or two, for life to actually happen.

Much love,
Mickeelie